CityPASS The Magical Key to Tourist Herding

I used to think that planning a trip to a big city meant hours of scrolling through travel blogs, creating color-coded spreadsheets, and pretending I cared about Yelp reviews. Enter CityPASS, which basically took my carefully cultivated neuroses, patted me on the head, and said, “Here, dear, we’ve already decided which attractions you’ll be impressed by.”

I tried it in Chicago. And by “tried it,” I mean I actually paid for it, because apparently CityPASS doesn’t just hand these things out to people like me who can barely handle a train schedule. One of the “must-sees” was the Shedd Aquarium, which, judging by its permanent slot in every CityPASS ever, I assume is considered the Beyoncé of aquariums. Naturally, we went—because when CityPASS basically points its finger at a building and says “go there,” you listen. And they weren’t wrong. The fish had better real estate than I do, and the building itself looked like it was designed for royalty, not sea otters.

The setup is simple: in Chicago, you get a couple of attractions automatically, and then you get to pick three others, much like a tourist tasting menu. My family treated it like we were assembling a fast-food combo meal—“Do you want the Art Institute of Chicago or the Adler Planetarium with two shows? Oh look, it comes with fries!” Honestly, I appreciated the forced structure. Left to my own devices, I would’ve dragged everyone to three different coffee shops and called it a cultural experience.

What makes it feel less like a coupon book and more like insider magic is the upgrades that come with it. At Willis Tower, we breezed past the long line of people fanning themselves with their paper tickets, which was the highlight of my trip. (The view was nice too, I suppose.) At Adler Planetarium, instead of squinting at a bunch of glowing dots, we had actual show tickets included. I felt like someone finally recognized my true worth as a person who doesn’t like paying for add-ons.

Do I recommend it? If your idea of vacation fun is standing in line, overpaying, and playing “which museum doesn’t bore the kids to tears,” then no, don’t get CityPASS. But if you’d like a shortcut to the obvious-but-still-awesome attractions without emptying your savings account, then yes. CityPASS is basically the cheat code for being a tourist—one that saves you money and makes you look slightly more organized than you actually are.