20 'Bad' Dad Jokes

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there! I know my memories of my own dad include his constant joke telling; some of them so bad we were all hysterical. Here are some of my personal faves in honor of my Dad who is very missed every day, but especially today.

Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed
Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta
What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on it’s own? It was two tired
Why are cats bad storytellers? They only have one tale
Why don’t skeletons go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with (get it…no body…)
What did the fried rice say to the shrimp? Don’t wok away from me
You know why I don’t trust stairs? They’re always up to something
Did you hear the rumor about the butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.
Why did the math book look so sad? Because of all its problems
If you see a crime at the Apple Store….does that make you an iWitness?
Never trust atoms. They make up everything
Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island
How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut
What is black, white and read all over? A newspaper
I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. Its a total rip-off
Why do bees have sticky hair? They use a honeycomb
Why didn’t the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe

So there you have it..some of the best, most terrible dad jokes out there. Go throw a steak on the grill, fill up your pint glass and read these at your backyard BBQ today!

Happy Father’s Day to all!