Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there! I know my memories of my own dad include his constant joke telling; some of them so bad we were all hysterical. Here are some of my personal faves in honor of my Dad who is very missed every day, but especially today.
- Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed
- Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it
- What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta
- What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y
- How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on it’s own? It was two tired
- Why are cats bad storytellers? They only have one tale
- Why don’t skeletons go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with (get it…no body…)
- What did the fried rice say to the shrimp? Don’t wok away from me
- You know why I don’t trust stairs? They’re always up to something
- Did you hear the rumor about the butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.
- Why did the math book look so sad? Because of all its problems
- If you see a crime at the Apple Store….does that make you an iWitness?
- Never trust atoms. They make up everything
- Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island
- How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut
- What is black, white and read all over? A newspaper
- I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. Its a total rip-off
- Why do bees have sticky hair? They use a honeycomb
- Why didn’t the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe
So there you have it..some of the best, most terrible dad jokes out there. Go throw a steak on the grill, fill up your pint glass and read these at your backyard bbq today!
Happy Father’s Day to all!